Summer is in full swing and I am already seeing back to school stuff everywhere I go. Rachel even said “I don’t want to think about school during summer but every store reminds me that it’s almost here.” I thought about that statement and the more and more I thought I was reminded of a word that has stripped some of us from embracing our true worth or kept me from fully chasing after MY own God-given dreams. That word is EXPECTATION. I don’t think we understand how damaging it can be. I lived my entire life in the shadows of other people’s expectations and their “perception” of who they wanted me to be shackled me from being who God had created me to be. I know so many parents including myself who place a certain level of expectation on our kids and when they don’t meet it we become frustrated and sometimes upset with our kids. I have really started to step back and evaluate how often I do that to my own girls just in the last few weeks and months. For instance both of my girls are responsible for cleaning their rooms and neither does it like I WANT IT DONE! I mean it drives me bonkers and for so long I would re-do and fuss, ground them, take stuff away you name it and then I realized I was doing more damage. I was placing MY expectations on them and they couldn’t meet them within my boundary of thinking. Rebekah’s idea of cleaning is everything off the floor and into the closet. I have learned to breathe before I walk into her room and pray nothing bites me in the process haha but honestly our relationship has strengthened and she has now started to actually FOLD HER CLOTHES and put them away. You see what if your words determine whether or not your daughter, your sister, that stranger you meet chases after a dream or throws up their hands and says I CAN’T do this. Just yesterday I was shopping with Rebekah who is almost 14 and she wanted Richard to take Rachel to her stores and she wanted me to go with her to try on a bajillllllion outfits. Every piece she picked up in my mind I was saying NOOOOOO not that but I refused to say anything because she was walking in confidence in her decisions. (one day she will look back and say MOM WHY DID YOU LET ME WEAR THAT! ) She waked out with a few cute things (I said a few hahaha) and she felt truly accomplished because she had picked out what SHE WANTED and even more she was happy because I let her buy it. My expectation of wanting her to dress a certain way could have ruined a moment, crushed her confidence and pushed her away from who God is calling her to be. I was reminded of a story in 1 Samuel 17 -David and Goliath. We have heard this story about a strong young man who kicked the tail of a giant with a few rocks. As I read that story this past week I noticed something I had never noticed before…
1 Samuel 17 38 Then Saul dressed David in his own tunic. He put a coat of armor on him and a bronze helmet on his head. 39David fastened on his sword over the tunic and tried walking around, because he was not used to them. “I cannot go in these,” he said to Saul, “because I am not used to them.” So he took them off. 40 Then he took his staff in his hand, chose five smooth stones from the stream, put them in the pouch of his shepherd’s bag and, with his sling in his hand, approached the Philistine.
Saul dressed David in his OWN TUNIC and David couldn’t even walk around in it. Saul wanted to protect him and equip him for battle. When David took off what Saul put on him and fought with HIS rocks and who he was Goliath went down. Imagine if David would have run to the battle line with all of Saul’s armor clanking around the story might have not ended the way it did. You see Saul wanted to protect David but the key word was HIS ARMOR! We place our expectations on people with the hope of “helping” or protecting them based on what we think is right and God wants to use their talents, their personalities, their quirks and their weaknesses to bring forth MIGHTY things! Don’t allow others to cloth you in their dreams and don’t cloth others in yours. CHASE after your own God-given dreams exactly how you are and allow God to BLOW YOUR MINDS!!! Now GO change the world!!!.