I spoke at a youth conference this past Saturday and before I walked on stage my heart was pounding so hard in my chest I thought when I walked on that stage these people were going to see my heart jumping out of my chest. I prayed over and over again God fill me with You. When it was my cue I walked on stage and as I began to speak a complete calm came over me and I have never felt so alive!! God has given me such a desire to speak and the more inadequate I feel it’s as if God speaks truth into my heart and silences my fears. I am so overwhelmed at what He is up to and yet scared out of my mind! I think the most amazing thing is just trusting with complete abandon and waiting on His perfect timing! I use to measure my success by other people standards and I would always come up short and when I began to embrace the freedom I have in Christ that measuring stick went into the trash can. I want to be who God created me to be. I said I want to be….. I fight the demons of self image daily and I win at times and other times the devil pins me down. I am learning what it means to take EVERY thought captive and know that when I am facing the enemy in the end I will win because I am FREE 🙂 I have been recently reading in Joshua and last night I came across a passage that made me think about how many times I have ended up in the hands of the enemy and asked God what in the world went wrong?????
Joshua 7: 12 that is why the Israelites cannot stand against their enemies; they turn their backs and run because they have been made liable to destruction. I will not be with you anymore unless you destroy whatever among you is devoted to destruction. 13 “Go, consecrate the people. Tell them, ‘consecrate yourselves in preparation for tomorrow; for this is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: That which is devoted is among you, O Israel. You cannot stand against your enemies until you remove it.
Removing things in our hearts that will lead to destruction is a painful process. Since January I have been on a journey to losing weight and even deeper than that overcoming my addiction to food. I had taken God off the throne and replaced it with the food for many years. I have begged God for at least 12 years to help me lose this weight and it wasn’t until I began to surrender every thought, every urge, every feeling every need to Him that I began to feel victory in this area. It was admitting it and then surrendering it to my Father in Heaven. I have lost weight weekly now and I have gone down one size so far. I am claiming victory but like the Israelites I had to remove the things I was devoted to… What needs to be removed from your heart in order for you to claim victory over your enemies? Giants in your life?