This past weekend was simply AMAZING! Richard and I along with the girls went to Boone with Adam/Lori/Luke/DD and Dusty…. to a mountain house literally at the top of the mountain! Since last November we have not been able to really rest or even relax because of the constant stress of worrying about Richard’s mom. It’s been almost a month since she has passed and the lingering effects are still here and the grieving process is a slow one! I miss her like crazy!  Her laugh, her constant encouragement, her validation for the girls, her praise for everything big and small, her understanding, her calmness…I could go on and on! Rachel has shocked me, not that I ever thought she wouldn’t miss her, it’s just the bond between Rebekah and Janice was something I could never explain. Rachel loved Janice so much and I think that now that Janice has passed away she realizes how much Janice meant to her. She told me yesterday that she wished “Goudy” was still rocking in her chair, calling her “Dr. Noddy” oh that broke my heart. Remember the song from 80’s rock category. “Don’t know what you got…till its gone” I can see myself back in the day HUGE bangs…black t-shirt days 🙂 HAHA! Janice’s life has made such a lasting impact on all of us, and we didn’t even realize HOW much until she had passed…..This past weekend, we laughed, we laughed, I mean A LOT! We talked deep, spiritual, we were quiet, and we looked at the beautiful fall leaves as they fell from the trees. God’s presence was among us for sure! Every time we would do anything from playing a board game to being outside on the porch, Goudy’s name would come up. I thought to myself I hope that one day others can look back at my life and say things about me like….she listened, she inspired, she pursued God, she showed love to others, she validated, she showed mercy……..Janice is truly leaving a lasting legacy in my heart! I want to be like her, and she inspires me to be all that I can:)

 Last night I taught on being driven by either love or fear. I taught out of 1 John 4 and 5. I talked about how when you are driven by fear, those around you are affected by it, and also things begin to only be about you, and the representation of Christ is not a true picture of who He is…but when you are driven by LOVE… PERFECT love! Things begin to happen and you begin to see clearly, you begin to communicate with others on a whole new level, you begin to love others, you begin to see yourself differently, and you begin to pursue God with all you are. I love the part where it says…..

1 John 18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear.

It’s like when someone gets expelled from school they can’t participate in any activities, or be on the property! When we are about the things of God, I mean your heart beats for Christ and nothing else, God just does something and the worries, fear, anxiety we carry just isn’t there. We are able to trust God fully because we are learning and pursuing Him with all we have:) 

1 John 17 And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect.

Learning to love God wholeheartedly is a process; we must continue to LIVE in Him and then when that occurs we begin to see our love for HIM grow! And then as our love is perfected through HIM….FEAR IS EXPELLED 🙂 good stuff!

but what seems to happen is a small/big distraction creeps in through “church stuff”, relationships, jobs, financial strife, being busy, you name it and then we are left in the cold questioning God’s purpose, not pursuing our dreams and then we begin to feel numb and left NOT knowing how are what we truly feel.

1 John 5:21 Dear children, keep away from anything that might take God’s place in your hearts.[a]

 Are you driven…………

By love?   Or fear?


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