I rested at Chuck E Cheese

 

Today is Monday, June 2nd….I am still very tired, overwhelmed, exhausted, emotionally drained you name it. If you wanna climb down in the pit well, come on in and join me! I am realizing how hard it is to fully take on the care giver roll. Janice and I have had so many life talks in the past two weeks. She has been apart of my life for 16 years, and we have always been close. She loves God, and continues to find peace in the dying process. She struggled so much while in the hospital, and now she is just resting in Him, and awaiting her time. I love watching her tell stories to Rebekah and Rachel, she validates them so much! I mean it might be a story about a rock, and Janice’s face just lights up and gives them her undivided attention. I have thought so much about life, lately and the mistakes I have made over the years through relationships (friendships/family/etc)! My actions reflected my heart. For years it has been about me, and me only. I have learned over these past 3 years who I truly am! When you fall in love with Christ, I mean really fall in love (head over heels) with Him, your actions begin to reflect how much you truly honor who God is. HONOR? hmmmm that word! what does it mean? well yesterday Roger’s sermon was on the commandment HONOR your father and mother. Now I was so ready for Rebekah to listen up and really embrace what it meant TO DO WHAT I SAY, but instead I was the one sinking down in my sit, asking myself about honoring God through my relationships. I realized that when I don’t honor people, I am NOT honoring God. I fail to speak to someone in the grocery store line  because I am tired, and don’t really care to talk to anyone. The hope I have in my heart is paralyzed by ME! It was so funny because I turned to my lil cuz and said this is not what I was expecting. Our actions speak volumes to people. I can praise God with my  hands raised, read my bible 20 times a day, quote scripture…but unless I am willing to serve others, and meet their need (emotionally/physically) well then my actions might as well say my heart is not where it needs to be. When we create a checklist of how and when we are to serve God, then we have to realize we are missing the bigger picture. So anyways…the sermon was a eye opener for many and God moved through worship all the way to last night, when Richard spoke and our youth showed who they really are through testimony and praise! Friday night I had Gina, and Megan spend the night with me along with Meagan, Ali and Blake we stayed up looking at old college yearbooks, and high school, and middle school yearbooks. We laughed so hard I thought we would fall over. Gina brought meagan’s graduation party leftovers and we grazed most of the night. It was a needed distraction for me. I wanted to rest. Saturday me and Gina headed to Chuck E Cheese to chillax! The girls played, and me and Gina just sat and talked and talked for over two hours, I got some much needed rest at Chuck E Cheese, now…the air condition was broken, kids were screaming everywhere,and loud veggie tale music was playing but some how in the midst of all the chaos I rested. I am so thankful for those moments now days. I love my family and friends so much and I appreciate their sacrifices for me. Leslie Mansfield sent me the sweetest card and her actions reflected that Christ was pouring out of her heart as she offered her time to help me with housework, or the kids and I don’t really know her very well…, Adam and Lori came by and cut our grass as well as Janice’s, their actions reflected Christ pouring out of their hearts, Gina giving me her undivided attention for 2 or more hours in the midst of chaos showed me that her heart is for God! So today I will find rest, because I am looking for moments such as this very moment to reflect on all the good things, and God moments that have happened throughout the day! I am thankful……and I will find rest:) Holly <><

Psalm 37

Psalm 23 (Janice’s favorite verse right now)

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